What exactly constitutes a "good day"?
Humans ask each other, "How was your day?" every single day. Not a day goes by that someone doesn't reply..."I had a good day." It's almost as bad as asking, "How are you?" without really wanting an answer...
My favorite answers to the BS version of the question, "How are you?"
-"I'm on the right side of the dirt."
-"If I was any better I'd punch you in the mouth. Lucky for you I'm just OK."
-"I am depressed and angry. Do you have fifteen minutes? It started when I was twelve and I visited my Uncle's farm..."
Sometimes I'd much prefer to reply to "How was your day?" with...
"Rot in hell. Go eat a fern and quit smiling."
"You don't really care at all, I can tell by the way you haven't even looked up from your meatloaf."
"Just give me my groceries, Wanda...Cashier with 3 Years of Service."
"My day was loaded with disappointment and trimmed with chaos. Can I get a family size pepperoni and a side of shut-up-and-make-my-pizza?"
I never do this, partly because its rude to be honest with people. There's also the commonly held notion that a meaningless icebreaker question or interruption of silence between strangers should be dealt with in the most pleasant way. Like pretending to be on your phone in a really important conversation as you pass a panhandler on a crowded street...
Panhandler (spots you from 100 yards and stares, then walks toward you)...
You (Answering a "call" from a dying friend): "Hi Leroy...how the heck are you? I heard you were terribly sick!!" (loud)
Panhandler: "Tryin' to make a down payment on a cheeseburger...can you help me out?"
You: (Pointing to the phone with an expression of, "I would but I'm on a really important phone call with my dying best friend.."): "Sorry friend! God bless!"
Magically, your friend is cured 15 feet later and just in time for you to go shopping for a book at Barnes and Noble. You weren't rude...just not in the mood.
But what happens when you have a truly, authentically, unforeseen and wholly unexpected Good Day? How can you capture this feeling and replay it for someone without being drippy or sounding disingenuous? How often does is even happen??
Ice Cube laid out a good day in song once. It included getting high, not getting shot and hanging out. For Bill Gates or Alan Greenspan, that would not be a good day. But for a kid from Compton...pretty good. If Greenspan even owned an AK, it would not be a very good day. So you see, a good day is clearly in the eye of the beholder.
If Lebron James scores 11 points in front of 10,000 people and gets paid $145,000 for the effort, he would get booed off the court. He would have to answer questions about his mediocre day for hours after the game. He would spend the rest of the evening hearing it from his teammates.
If Fennis Dembo could un-retire and score 11 points in front of 10,000 people and get a check for $145,000...that would be a good day. Ya'll Wyoming folks know what I'm talkin about.
I had a good day today. It wouldn't pass as a good day for Carlos Santana or Martha Stewart, but it was a good day. I wanted to tell you about it because I realized that they just don't happen very often once I gave it some thought. Every day is not a highlight reel for most people. Every day is boring. Sometimes, every day is like Sunday and everything is silent and gray. But once in a while, you simply beg with your eyes for someone to ask how your day was, so that you can explode on them with your joy. It doesn't have to entail a visit from the Publisher's Clearinghouse or Shakira's car breaking down in your driveway, either. Sometimes a good day can spring from simply achieving what you set out to achieve.
When you get up tomorrow and look at your to-do list, go ahead and erase it and put your clothes on backward. Take an alternative route to the office and call your Aunt Judy for no reason. Fix that damn garage door handle and spring for lunch for a total stranger. Make a big deal out of how nice your spouse looks, and hug your kids extra hard. Take your neighbor's newspaper up to their front door and change a light bulb in your basement that you've intended to change since August.
Whatever you do...do it because it makes you feel good and because it needs to get done and it benefits someone else as well. Then, and maybe only then, you can gush about what a great day you had. If that doesn't pan out, just keep faking it with the kid at Papa Murphy's.
